Snark, Critic and Pop!

I always wanted the guy to win.

Is it just me or does the thought of a bear mauling someone bring laughter into your heart too? Is it because we know that a female skier beat one senseless so we know they are cowardly furballs? Or is it just that every time we see one we think of it wearing a tutu and dancing for drunk Russians? Either way, NOT LIKE THIS!!!!!

The Asylum’s “Age of the Hobbits“, uh… I mean Clash of Empires is now available at Redbox meaning my Friday night is now biz-ay!  Written by Eric Forsberg (Mega Piranha, Snakes on a Train) and Directed by Joseph Lawson (Nazis at the Center of the Earth) and starring Bai Ling and Christopher Judge it sounds every bit of low-budget awesome:

In an ancient age, peace-loving tribe are enslaved by a race of flesh-eating dragon-riders. The young tribesman Goben must join forces with their neighbor giants, the humans, to free his people (continue reading…)

Directed by Jonathan Glazer

Ah, I remember this film from when I was a kid. Not sure what is worse, the trailer or the movie itself. How could it be bad with such a great cast? Buy the VHS tape from your neighbor’s garage sale and find out…

100 years ago Teddy Roosevelt, shown here in what is surely a historically accurate picture, was shot in the chest at close range by deranged saloon keeper John Schrank.  He went on stage anyway and spoke for an hour before being rushed to the hospital.  During the speech he famously said “You see, it takes more than one bullet to kill a Bull Moose” providing what became the nickname for the progressive party and himself in the years that followed.  Talk about balls.  How big were they, you ask?  Well, his left one now houses his presidential library.

North Korea claims it has rockets which can strike targets in the mainland US.  The KCNA (North Korean news agency) claims:

“We do not hide (the fact) that the revolutionary armed forces … including the strategic rocket forces are keeping within the scope of strike not only the bases of the puppet forces and the U.S. imperialist aggression forces’ bases in the inviolable land of Korea, but also Japan, Guam and the U.S. mainland”

Speaking of the North Korean news agency, if you ever want a good laugh (continue reading…)

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There are many negative stereotypes in this world, but only some are true (Uwe Boll continues to prove the stereotype that all his movies are awful is true). Today a certain black bear proved once again that the stereotype of bears being cowards is true:

When you read the IMDB description, this sounds exciting… “For a thousand years, the Reapers guarded mankind from the demons that wait in the dark. Now, at the beginning of a new age, the Reapers are betrayed and slaughtered. Only one Reaper remains – Red, and she’s out to exact revenge.” Then you see the trailer and you know just how exciting it really is (assuming that like me you are a cinematic masochist). This thing boasts six writers for crying out loud! How can it not be awesome!

A nice little clip of Andy Serkis who plays Gollum in the LOTR and the upcoming Hobbit trilogy (ARG!) reading to children in character. I would imagine all those children spent the night screaming in wet bed sheets.