Snark, Critic and Pop!

We all know that Snark Critic Pop has become a hotbed for bear apologists and furry propaganda.  David Booth of the Florida Panthers is doing his best to fight against our bearly tolerable friends (get it?  BEAR-ly tolerable?)  Booth, who is an avid bow hunter took out this 7 foot tall menace and then tweeted this photo as a warning to any other bear out there who might have ideas…

It’s the Memphis Grizzlies Anthem “Home Of The Grizzlies” by my homebear, Young Jai.
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You will believe a bear can fly!

A movie from Seth MacFarlane, starring Mila Kunis, Mark Wahlberg, and a talking teddy bear. What could possibly go wrong?

In an apprent attempt to frighten and confuse anyone who might for some reason be a fan of the Tampa Bay Devil Rays the team will be giving out Zim Bears on June 29th.  The Detroit Tigers will be in town, and what better way to celebrate your team losing, than to go home with something that will undoubtedly give your children nightmares.  The bears were best described at Big League Stew:

…half-crusty old coach Don Zimmer, half-cuddly teddy bear and 100 percent terrifying.

Friends, I know there’s been some unnecessary and unprovoked bear hatred on the blog of late, but I’m here to set the record straight.  We all know that bears are really great.  Hey, that rhymed!  I’ll do some more should I find the time.  May I present to you a series of amazing bear facts?  For example, bears life weights, that’s why they’re really jacked.

• Unlike Brian Alterman, bears are excellent dancers.
• Unlike humans, bears are getting close to a cure for cancer.
• A polar bear can swim for 50 miles.
• Bear fashion never goes out of style.
  They ain’t no endangered species.
  Unlike monkeys, we ask politely before we hurl our feces.
  When we bears rule the world, we will eat you last.
  Who will be first?  The Jersey Shore cast.

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The week stared off great for all you bear-huggers out there, as the Ukraine decided to free all of the bearsthey usually torment for fun.  Environment Minister Mykola Zlochevsky was quoted as saying:

“How long can we tolerate animal torture in restaurants where drunken guests make bears drink vodka for laughs?”

How long?  I wouldn’t have set a limit, I would have just let it play out its natural course.  I imagine that would last until shortly after the Earth was destroyed (we know the evil aliens who did it would take these bears with them for their own amusement, but I can’t (continue reading…)

In a bold movie (albeit one I had the courage to make before the playoffs started), the grizzly bears at the Memphis Zoo have officially picked their hometown team the Memphis Grizzlies to defeat the Oklahoma City Thunder in Sunday’s pivotal, NBA Playoffs Game 7: (continue reading…)

Between Bruins fans thinking they can fly, and blogger/bear propagandist Daniel Roos and his seemingly daily bear love-fest articles, I felt I had to step up and set the record straight. Bears are here for my amusement, and my amusement only. How can they provide amusement? Try kicking one in the junk.  Trying stealing a picinic basket from another.  Maybe we can warm the globe a little and reduce habitat.  Perhaps you are a football fan?  Maybe you should root against the bears, being that they still suck.  Bears need to learn there place – stuffed in a corner, or rug in front of fire place.   That’s all.

Note: No more caffeine for me!

Only three sports experts — myself, Sleepy Cat McGee, and Charles Barkley — picked the Memphis Grizzlies to beat the San Antonio in the 1st round.  Now that Zach Randolph and the Grizz have not only done that, but taken Game One from the Oklahoma Boom Booms, I’m making MORE PICKS! 

Hold onto your butts:

 # 1: The Boston Bruins will win the Stanley Cup this year.  (continue reading…)

Two words: Memphis Grizzlies.