Snark, Critic and Pop!

It’s funny in retrospect, since I didn’t die. I was listening to the chorus of David Crowder Band’s “Beautiful Collision” while driving down a windy back road. “Here it comes a beautiful collision/is happening now/Here it comes now.” And a guy coming the other way partially veered into my lane coming at me. We did not have a collision beautiful or otherwise, thanks to my quick wit and panicky driving skills. But I still like the song: (continue reading…)

200 M.P.H. is a fast yet not entirely furious b-movie car orgy. Designed to be the Asylum’s mockbuster answer to Fast Five, 200 M.P.H. promises cars and babes. It delivers. And there’s even something for the ladies: SNP’s favorite Asylum regular, muscle man Paul Logan as a corrupt cop.

200 M.P.H. is not the type of movie meant to make you think. The only moral dilemma explored is how long after a adult son’s death is too soon for a “exotic dancer” to return to bumping and grinding at the local strip club.  (continue reading…)

I’m not proud of it, but I saw the testosterone fueled, car orgy film known as ”Fast Five” this week.  Emboldened by too much free time and the strangely positive rating (79%!) on RottenTomatoes.com, I bought a ticket to see the fifth installment of the Fast & the Furious franchise. 

First off, Fast Five is not a “good” movie.  But it is a fun movie.  Oodles of ridiculous car chases, over the top fights, the 1,030,983rd rooftop chase scene filmed in Rio, and enough stuff blowin’ up that you never get bored or have enough time to wonder why you ought to care.

Our intrepid heroes (Vin Diesel, Paul Walker, and Jordana Brewster) are on the run from the law in Rio.  They take a shady job with shady people to steal cars from a train.  (continue reading…)