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Tag: Unnecessary Remakes

TRAILER: Red Dawn (2012)

by on Aug.10, 2012, under Movies

The North Koreans are coming! The North Koreans are coming! Wait, what? (continue reading…)

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by on Jan.21, 2012, under Movies, Only on the Internet

Amazing, admirable, and/or really sad. A full-length, scene-for-scene, word-for-word recreation of Star Wars: A New Hope made by a compilation of fan contributions. Includes fan-acting, lego work, child acting, bottle-figures, every imaginable form of crude animation, and various other recreations. It runs the entire two hours! (I made it only ten minutes, see if you can beat my record!) (continue reading…)

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REVIEW: 3 Musketeers (2011 – The Asylum’s Version!)

by on Oct.26, 2011, under Movies

The Asylum’s 3 Musketeers is more fun than should be legally allowed in living rooms.  There.  I said it, and I’d say it again if I had to.

No, this is not your granddad’s Three Musketeers.  You know, the 1,383rd adaptation of Alexander Dumas’ literary classic that no one reads outside book reports.  (The 1,382nd Musketeer remake discreetly slunk in and quietly out of theaters this week, despite the undeniable star power of Orlando Bloom.)

Hey, you big Dumas, if I had the high school English teachers lobby in my back pocket, my novel Perfecta would be a literary classic too!

Nay, our friends at the Asylum have opted to modernize the Three Musketeers, and replace the “Three” with a “3″ so that their movie shows up earlier in the online ques. (continue reading…)

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Of All The Films To Remake . . .

by on Sep.13, 2011, under Movies, News

In the spirit of renewed, bipartisan, fiscal responsibility, the FBI will teach another mook how to surf. 

Yes, loyal readers, Hollywood is going to remake the Keanu Reeves-Patrick Swayze classic Point Break (1991).  Whoa.  Or, is “why?” the more appropriate query, when Swayze’s iconic Roadhouse remains stubbornly unremade? (continue reading…)

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